I love family vacation.

A quick recap of our fabulous time together this past week! 

Saturday 9/18- drive to Florida. A few pit stops along the way...the most remarkable being a visit to the ER of a Children's Hospital.  We suspect "nursemaids elbow", but perhaps we'll never actually know. We went through triage, and they felt that's what it was based on Matthew not moving his arm and crying if he did. They put a sling on it and while we waited (about 30 minutes or so) to see the doctor, his arm was better. Literally, as if nothing had happened, better. I told the doctor she was the best we've ever had- healed him without ever seeing him! She did a quick exam, realized he was completely fine, and sent us on our merry way.  Arrived at Mike's parents house that night.

Sunday 9/19- spent a good part of the day at the beach.  Matthew LOVES the beach! He made a mess of sand everywhere and runs into the ocean without a care in the world. Someone has to be on him at all times, that's for sure. Not very relaxing, but certainly fun! Matthew loves the fish at Grandma and Grandpa's house. "Look, there's a fish!" 

Monday 9/20- Drive another 7 or so hours to my parents house.  Fairly uneventful drive, other then having to pull over and take Matthew out of his car seat so he could poop.  He doesn't like to/can't  poop while sitting in the seat, plus he had some *ahem* issues...poor boy sounded like he was giving birth. It was all very traumatic...for me.  What a relieved little boy he was when that was over. LOL- he's going to love that I included that part when he reads this when he's older.

Tuesday 9/21- Epcot all day. I'd have to say Matthew's favorite was the Monorail. He's obsessed with choo choo's, so riding the monorail was pretty much the coolest thing ever.  My favorite part just may have been the very refreshing frozen margarita my mom and I shared. Delicious.  Ate dinner at the little cafe my parents work at since my dad was working that night. Pretty sure they thoroughly enjoyed showing off Matthew to all their co-workers there.

Wednesday 9/22- Magic Kingdom all day.  So much fun! This park really is the epitome of Disney to me, I guess because it's the one I remember the most from childhood visits.  It really is so amazing going there with my child, and seeing it all through his eyes.  I think a few people think he's too young, and true probably won't remember too much, but *I* will remember. The look of amazement on his face when he saw Mickey for the first time, followed by complete shyness with him.  Watching his eyes as he took in every little thing on each ride we went on.  Seeing him smile, laugh, point, dance with the characters in the parade.  Yes, going to Disney is different with a small child, as you pretty much have to cater the day to them, but it's different in such a perfect way.  Would I have liked to stay out late and see the fireworks? Sure. But how fair would that be to my tired little man wiped out from a day full of magic and amazement?  I'd say we did just enough every day for all of us.

Thursday 9/23- Animal Kingdom all day.  Matthew loved the safari ride! Every time we hit a bump he'd shout "wee!" and he enjoyed seeing all the different animals.  Giraffes just a few feet from where we sat!  He also really enjoyed seeing the Finding Nemo show.  Nemo is somewhat new to him- he's seen it once I think, but we bought it and he watched in in the car on the way to Florida, so he was now more familiar with Nemo and would shout "Nemo" (pronounced Nem-o, not Neemo).  It was a long wait for the show to start, but he did amazing.

Friday 9/24- stayed at my parents house, doing laundry and putting up birthday decorations, relaxing a bit.  That night we had a birthday bash for my awesome, beautiful, handsome, so smart niece and nephew!!! 7 and 8 years old! What?!?!? I love them so much more then words can say- and I am so happy we were able to celebrate their birthdays in person this year, even if my little man was a tad whiny that evening.

Saturday 9/25- drive back to Mike's parents house. Pit stop to have lunch with Mike's friend from his college days. Matthew was also a tad whiny at that meal, and I don't think he ate a morsel of food, but who can blame him? He certainly had a FULL week.  I know Mike loved being able to see his buddy again, if only for a quick visit.  Arrive at grandpa and grandma's house and Matthew says "fish. Please. fish."  He loves those fish!

Sunday 9/26- LONG drive, but HOME again!  What a fabulous vacation!

2 very quick things worth noting-

Matthew slept in a big boy bed the whole time we were at my parents house. It was a twin size bed with a safety rail thing on the side.  Unbelievably, he had no problem with this.  Went right to bed without climbing out, and stayed there all night.  The last day he got out of bed in the morning to find us, but until then, he had just been waiting in bed for someone to get him.  What a big boy!!

Also, the week before we left, Matthew had suddenly spit out full sentences a time or two.  Took me by complete shock, as he didn't really have a whole lot of words (to our knowledge) and was still speaking mostly gibberish.  Anyway, this trend continued while we were gone. Out of nowhere, Matthew would just say something.  The one's I remember, probably because they were the most surprising:

"put me down."

"leave me alone!"

"I want to sit."

"I want milk please"

"look there's a ______(fish, turtle, Mickey, babci, mommy)"

This really amused and amazed us! I love him.

Pictures to come- haven't downloaded them yet, but wanted to get the recap written before I forgot.

Long story long

Disclaimer: this is one of those very real and honest posts that come out once in a while.  Was going to skip it all together, but in keeping true to myself, decided to include. I always said this blog was about my life.  I think it's important to have a history of life--one day my kids, and maybe my grand kids, will be able to read about the good and the bad.

If I start at the beginning, it's starts with the first miscarriage.  Actually, it starts before that. I knew I was having some thyroid issues, I just didn't know how bad.  When you're overweight, you just assume it's always going to be a struggle.  You don't figure you'd count calories, go low carb, workout and not lose anything, sometimes even gain!  So it started there, and after a few blood tests, I'm put on some medicine for my thyroid. And by golly, I lost some weight! I was also newly pregnant at the time, so I obviously didn't lose much.  In hindsight I suppose that should have clued me in that something wasn't right.  Sure enough, the next time my thyroid levels were checked, they were now too high and I stopped the medicine.  A few days later I had a miscarriage.  Now, we were right in the middle of moving when that all happened, and honestly just forgot the whole thyroid thing even happened. I figured I'd get a re-check when I found a primary physician in town.

I started having some odd symptoms, such as my heart racing really fast and skipping beats (frequently skipping beats--the weirdest, scariest feeling when you don't know what's going on).  I was also tired all the time, to the point of needing naps and literally feeling like I was walking through mud.  At about the same time, I found out I was pregnant again! Our excitement was short lived, as I found out after my first appointment (in July) that I was about to miscarry again.  After the second miscarriage, I had some thyroid tests repeated and much to my shock- I wasn't hypothyroid anymore. I was extremely hyPERthyroid.  Which in hindsight, explains the heart stuff.  I was also hot and sweaty all the time- which I was chalking up to being in Texas again. But it was really bad- I'd lay down at night and swear I was lying in a sauna, despite the air conditioning.  (side note- hyperthyroidism can cause weight loss, but wouldn't you know I'd be in the percentage of people who don't lose anything! I mean, my metabolism is pumping, but the scale isn't moving. It would figure.  Even when sick I can't lose it easily!)

After discovering I was hyperthyroid, I was sent to a primary physician, and from there, an endocrinologist.  A bunch of blood tests were run, a thyroid ultrasound and a thyroid scan using radioactive iodine.  The results: Grave's Disease.  Well, it's sort of complicated because my endo called it "diffuse toxic goiter" (do NOT, I repeat do NOT google goiter. You'll get some gross pictures, and my neck is a bit swollen, but I swear to you it doesn't look like that!).  The antibodies and scans all showed the same thing- Grave's.  Although my endo chooses to say "it's an autoimmune disease in the same family as Grave's, but you don't have any eye problems, so we won't call it Grave's".  I am choosing to call it Grave's because for all intents and purposes, it is the same thing.  My eyes just aren't bulging out of my head.  Thus begins my treatment options.  Let me start with, making a decision about treatment is not as easy when you plan to have another child.  Complicated by the fact that I'm 35.  So, I'm also seeing a reproductive endocrinologist, who is doing a bunch of tests related to pregnancy loss and figuring out how many good eggs I have left. Oh the joys of modern medicine!  The reality is, the thyroid issue may very well be the reason for the miscarriages.  Or my age.  Or a complete and total fluke, for miscarriages are not as uncommon as you may think.  But if there tests out there to make sure it's not anything else, before we try again, then by golly, bring on the tests.  For the heartache of 1 miscarriage is mind numbing, I can't even begin to tell you the pain I felt after having a second one. 

After painstaking thought, research, opinions from others, I decided on treatment.  Well, it's scheduled anyway, I still have days of "Am I doing the right thing?" thoughts flying through my head all day long.  I will be having radioactive iodine treatment done on October 1st. Basically I swallow a pill, and because the thyroid takes up iodine introduced into the body (and I have a much higher then normal uptake because of the Grave's)- the radiation in the pill then basically destroys the thyroid.  This is not a decision I've come to lightly.  Having my thyroid destroyed is scary stuff.  Do you know what happens to people with no thyroid? They gain weight.  I'm sure I don't have to tell you how this terrifies me.  I've been fighting, struggling, crying over my weight, well basically my whole life, but even more so since pregnancy and having a baby.  I will be put on hormone replacement, and I'm just hoping I am one of the lucky ones who gets the levels fixed pretty quickly.  I will just continue to do what I can by eating healthy and exercising, and see what happens.  But I am terrified of this.

Other then that, the side effects are quite minimal.  The hardest and heartbreaking part of it all will be not seeing Matthew for a week.  I will be emitting radiation for a short period of time (weird, huh?) and it is especially important to be extra cautious with small children.  For a week he won't be home, and the second week he'll be here, but I won't be able to love on him and kiss him all the time--it's limited to an hour a day.  After that, we should be a bit more back to normal.  I will hopefully get to feeling better- no heart palpitations, more energy.  We will have to wait 6 months before trying for another child.  In the end, I do what I gotta do to make sure I am around long enough to enjoy the child I do have.  Hyperthyroidism is not something you mess around with- aside from the damage it can do to your heart, there are other complications that can occur.

So that's it.  Another bump in the road that is life, but oh how blessed I am to be living this life of mine! Speed bumps and all.

Preschool!

Matthew had his first day of preschool yesterday!  Wish I could say I got a great first day picture, but he wasn't cooperating, so I got these instead:

Matthew hasn't yet told me about his first day, but I think it went ok.  His teacher said he did pretty well, although he did cry off and on throughout the day. (I wouldn't have expected any different.  Can you imagine going to school for the very first time, not knowing what it is, or how long you're stuck there? Scary stuff!)  I'm thankful he made it through the first day.  Ok, ok, really I'm thankful *I* made it through the first day.  It probably helped that I had a doctors appointment downtown--I was busy and didn't have time to miss him.

Too much.  He did not nap, which also didn't surprise me.  He still sleeps in a crib, with his white noise rain machine on. I really outta break him of that sometime--but he just sleeps so well with it! As soon as he hears it he starts yawning.  His teacher says "he's just so quiet with a little tiny voice". Huh?  Who's kid is she talking about? Matthew, quiet? Oh, and he was also slightly ticked off at me the rest of the day.  Wanted nothing to do with me, only daddy.  I guess he remembered I was the one who left him and ruined his perfect little routine of Mommy and me days.  Not to worry little man- there are still 5 days of the week you get to be with me still!  Anyway, got some art work in his take home folder--yay! I love seeing the little pictures he makes. 

Matthew, I love you so much! I'm so happy you have this opportunity to play with other kids and do fun things like music, art and everything else!  You are going to learn so much this year.  I just can't wait until you can tell me all about it.

What my nightmares sound like

As if one truck blaring Funky Town weren't enough, let's get all 3 going at once why don't we? (2 Funky Town, 1 Pump up the Jam)  Then, lets do it over and over and over again.

It's enough to drive any mommy to drink.

P.S. Not sure what is up with my kid assuming such weird positions to place a block, had to get low for a different perspective? 

Also, don't you love the seriousness on his face? Like, he HAD to get the music going and then all would be well in the world.  Or at least the playroom.

A boy and his backpack

After much, much thought, we've decided to send Matthew to a little preschool program this fall.  It is only 2 days a week for 4 hours each day, and although it's called "preschool", really it's a Mother's Day Out (MDO) program (if you've never heard of that, don't worry. I hadn't either- it's pretty popular at the churches here).  If you had asked me even 2 months ago, I would have said no way, we're not sending him until he's 3.  No reason other then 2 seems a bit young.  I'm not sure what changed in my mind, but I just think it's going to be so, so good for him.  He's not going to be away from me very long, and it'll just give me a chance to socialize more with kids his own age.  It is at a local church here, and they have a structured time there with circle time and lessons, music class,  and all that.   All in all, I think it's going to be a good thing for him.  And  you will not hear me complaining about me having a little break from everything toddler, that's for sure.

While Babci was here visiting last week (um, I didn't mention that did I? Mom was here for 4 days visiting us and Matthew LOVED having his Babci here!), she bought him a Mickey Mouse backpack and lunchbox for "school".  Matthew loves them. The first day he had it, he wore the backpack and carried that little lunchbox all over the house, and didn't want to take them off. It was so funny!

He tried to drive his car:

He sat on the couch while Babci read to him:

Did this post even make sense? I was watching Big Brother while typing, so I apologize if it doesn't.